Trixie: What the crap is up with Kenley not being sent home??? Honestly!!! I am starting to think that it is rigged. Why is she still here? She is rude, a one trick pony, annoying, and annoying. Tim Gunn, Heidi, and Nina deserve a LOT more respect than her yelling at them. If I was Heidi or Tim, I would have bitch slapped her by now. My theory: the producers realize she is the only hot girl and reason that boyfriends and husbands and lesbians watch the show, especially after that Kenley Spears outfit last night.
Roxie: I did not watch it. Who got kicked off? Who was in the bottom two? Is next week the finale? (Side note: this is so unlike me and normally I do not schedule anything on a Wednesday night but I had a fundraiser and though it's rare, I do find some things more important than Reality TV)
T: Do you want me to spoil it for you? Now they are down to 4. Not the finale.
R: Was it Suede? Please let it be Suede! You can ruin it for me. I won’t get to watch it till next week anyways. I didn’t DVR it.
T: Ok. It came down to Suede and Kenley and Suede got the boot. I completely disagreed with it.
R: You knew it was going to happen. Kenley won’t win, but she’s going to showcase her clothes. It’s a sad thing, but a must for ratings.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Weekly Predictions
Roxie: We're getting back to basics. Time for Weekly Predictions!
Trixie: First I need to get something off my chest. Heidi's fake birthday. I think I am more mad at TMZ for keeping these two around than I am at them for existing and sucking at life. Stop it! No one cares! And now I have wasted 5 minutes of my life on you that I will never get back. Have time to waste? See Heidi's fake birthday.
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
Project Runway
R: We're down to the final six. So, I believe this is when we're going to have to trim the fat and Suede is exactly that. Fat.
T: Please, God, let this week be the week that crazy bipolar freakout Joe gets the ax! I can not take another week of him and his cheap blue light special clothes. Awful, awful, awful. I have yet to see him do anything that even remotely resembles fashion and yet other people keep getting kicked off. HOW?
America's Next Top Model
R: It's so early in the season that this is hard. But this is make-over week so someone is going to mentally lose it because Tyra can't stand not being the prettiest one in the room. I think Clark looks too much like Kristin Cavallari and Tyra is all about Team LC. So long Clark!
T: I predict, shocking!, that Tyra makes some one get a pixie cut and they cry and look stupid and secretly hate Tyra for the rest of the show.
Real World Road Rule Challenge
R: I still don't understand the true premise of the game, but I'm going to assume the girls will be the first to go and who better than a newbie? I say Ashli is kicked off the island.
T: I refuse to come up with an original comment if MTV refuses to come up with an original concept.
Trixie: First I need to get something off my chest. Heidi's fake birthday. I think I am more mad at TMZ for keeping these two around than I am at them for existing and sucking at life. Stop it! No one cares! And now I have wasted 5 minutes of my life on you that I will never get back. Have time to waste? See Heidi's fake birthday.
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
Project Runway
R: We're down to the final six. So, I believe this is when we're going to have to trim the fat and Suede is exactly that. Fat.
T: Please, God, let this week be the week that crazy bipolar freakout Joe gets the ax! I can not take another week of him and his cheap blue light special clothes. Awful, awful, awful. I have yet to see him do anything that even remotely resembles fashion and yet other people keep getting kicked off. HOW?
America's Next Top Model
R: It's so early in the season that this is hard. But this is make-over week so someone is going to mentally lose it because Tyra can't stand not being the prettiest one in the room. I think Clark looks too much like Kristin Cavallari and Tyra is all about Team LC. So long Clark!
T: I predict, shocking!, that Tyra makes some one get a pixie cut and they cry and look stupid and secretly hate Tyra for the rest of the show.
Real World Road Rule Challenge
R: I still don't understand the true premise of the game, but I'm going to assume the girls will be the first to go and who better than a newbie? I say Ashli is kicked off the island.
T: I refuse to come up with an original comment if MTV refuses to come up with an original concept.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Wednesday Recap
Project Runway
R: Bye bye Blayne and your girlicious self. I do appreciate the fact that Blayne kept putting out crap after crap and made it this far. Clearly on personality only. Bye hateful Terri. Had you used Keith you might still be around. Then you could have rubbed it in Keith's face that you are infact better than him, that is no longer the case. And Kinley got a swift kick in the ego this episode. That should bring her down a notch or two.
T: Blayne, you had it coming. I heart you, you are ridiculous, but fashion is about more than tanning and using neon in every outfit. Terri, I don’t like Keith either but he could have really helped you. I blame you and you alone. I am sure the rest of your life you will continue to blame Keith. You are a sad, mean person and I kinda like it! Kinley is getting ballsy and bitchy and I would not assume to tell Hiedi Klum, a Victoria Secret model for the last bazillion years, where boobs are. I think she knows. And Nina Garcia, as crazy as she is, deserves SOME respect. She does afterall eat, breath, and sleep fashion. And don’t lie – you know what Dolce and Gabana looks like – it doesn’t change that much!
America's Next Top Model
R: Tranny was thisclose to getting kicked off ANTM. But of course, they must soak up all the tranniness that they can and she slid into the next round.
T: I predict that the Tranny stays around for atleast 3-5 more episodes. They will kick out the other girls who they know aren’t going to make it anyway, and then when it gets down to the Tranny vs. the girls with potential, they will have to kick shim off. Until then: Tranny Report!!!
America's Greatest Dog
R: The boxer won America’s Greatest Dog! Baffled! They did it for the twist. He won $250,000 for that! I think I’m going to enter.
T: I am so incredibly disappointed in this show. The boxer was cute – sure. The owner was AWFUL! As soon as I saw Galaxy get kicked off, I was over the show. Fixed and its obvious. Whatever… I am no longer admitting that show ever happened. Unless of course you go on it!
Road World/Real Rule Challenge
R: RW/RR Challenge is survivor meets MTV. I’m not crazy about it yet. I know MTV needed another setting and different rules, but it just feels like they couldn’t come up with anything original. And at this rate it’ll be a sausage fest before the half way point.
T: MTV can’t come up with anything. Why are you surprised that RW/RR Challenge is any different? I mean – the VMAs were so completely irrelevant this year that they had to get a no name from England to Host, Brit Brit to open, and I am sure had to pay all 3000 people who were there to show up and clap. I do have to give them credit for once again not giving Kanye West a VMA even though he is really the only person who cares about them anymore. Hilarious!
R: Bye bye Blayne and your girlicious self. I do appreciate the fact that Blayne kept putting out crap after crap and made it this far. Clearly on personality only. Bye hateful Terri. Had you used Keith you might still be around. Then you could have rubbed it in Keith's face that you are infact better than him, that is no longer the case. And Kinley got a swift kick in the ego this episode. That should bring her down a notch or two.
T: Blayne, you had it coming. I heart you, you are ridiculous, but fashion is about more than tanning and using neon in every outfit. Terri, I don’t like Keith either but he could have really helped you. I blame you and you alone. I am sure the rest of your life you will continue to blame Keith. You are a sad, mean person and I kinda like it! Kinley is getting ballsy and bitchy and I would not assume to tell Hiedi Klum, a Victoria Secret model for the last bazillion years, where boobs are. I think she knows. And Nina Garcia, as crazy as she is, deserves SOME respect. She does afterall eat, breath, and sleep fashion. And don’t lie – you know what Dolce and Gabana looks like – it doesn’t change that much!
America's Next Top Model
R: Tranny was thisclose to getting kicked off ANTM. But of course, they must soak up all the tranniness that they can and she slid into the next round.
T: I predict that the Tranny stays around for atleast 3-5 more episodes. They will kick out the other girls who they know aren’t going to make it anyway, and then when it gets down to the Tranny vs. the girls with potential, they will have to kick shim off. Until then: Tranny Report!!!
America's Greatest Dog
R: The boxer won America’s Greatest Dog! Baffled! They did it for the twist. He won $250,000 for that! I think I’m going to enter.
T: I am so incredibly disappointed in this show. The boxer was cute – sure. The owner was AWFUL! As soon as I saw Galaxy get kicked off, I was over the show. Fixed and its obvious. Whatever… I am no longer admitting that show ever happened. Unless of course you go on it!
Road World/Real Rule Challenge
R: RW/RR Challenge is survivor meets MTV. I’m not crazy about it yet. I know MTV needed another setting and different rules, but it just feels like they couldn’t come up with anything original. And at this rate it’ll be a sausage fest before the half way point.
T: MTV can’t come up with anything. Why are you surprised that RW/RR Challenge is any different? I mean – the VMAs were so completely irrelevant this year that they had to get a no name from England to Host, Brit Brit to open, and I am sure had to pay all 3000 people who were there to show up and clap. I do have to give them credit for once again not giving Kanye West a VMA even though he is really the only person who cares about them anymore. Hilarious!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
What has big hair and can't lip synch?
We were lucky enough to have this video forwarded from our new corespondent Mitzi.
M: I'm not even sure there are enough bullets in the world to put me out of my misery after wathing this! I'm definitely on team LC.
T: How could you ever be on team spiedi? He has transparent facial hair and big fake teeth and she literally is mentally retarded.
M: I can't tell if the sound is just off or if she is mouthing different words than the lyrics all together.
R: Why is the video 10 minutes long? How did she convince people to participate in this? Why is there a shot of a guy playing with his happy trail? This is disturbing. I'm team Lo. She's the only one not mentally retarded.
T: You are team Lo?!?! She is not mentally retarded but a gigantor bitch! I am going to be team Audrina if you are gong to be team Lo! Maybe team Whitney.
R: And a hilarious bitch at that one! Audrina sucks! She's so ditzy! And its taken her four seasons to grow balls.
T: First of all, Audrina is less ditzy than LC. Second, I think she has always had balls they just never showed her using them. She has always done whatever she wanted (hello dating Justin Bobby even though no one liked him). I am truly hurt that you are team Lo!
R: I can tell you taking this very personally. Aurdina could never hold her own show. Lo could and should have her own show. She says things that everyone else is thinking. Audrina is getting ballieser but against the wrong people. I do enjoy Whitney fully and am 100% on her team.
T: Back to the video. Where to begin....
Spencer did her hair and so automatically you know it is going to be horrible
R: I thought that was a wig!
T: Why did they do an 80's workout video? It makes no sense
R: My exact thoughts as well. Overdosin' so we'll work out? And it's weird that the girl in the two braids always makes angry faces at the camera. Although, I would too if I were in a Heidi video.
T: Is she lip syncing? Is her voice really worse than that?? And are they so poor they couldn't find someone better?
R: I have no idea what she's doing. I actually thought they put the wrong son to this video since she's obvisously mouthing something and it doesn't make sense to the video.
T: Why is it 10 minutes long when the sound only last 4? No one wants to see her dance like that!
R: It's quite strange. It just keeps going and going and going. I didn't watch the whole thing because I wanted to think when I was done watching it.
T: Do they really think people like them? Or are they just milking it until it lasts? Either way, I hate them, but it is king of genius. I would love to be in their brainstorming sessions. "How to annoy LC this week so we can stay relevant on the show. I know! Let's 'crash' our sister's birthday party so she will feel awkward!" "and then! Let's release the weirdest 80's video ever produced on You tube!" "Brillant! Now, let's go bleach our hair and facial hair and bleach our big fake teeth."
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Why Roxie and Trixie love the Olympics!
Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentataors so far during the Olympics that they would like to take back:
- Weight-lifting commentator: "This is Gregorieva from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
- Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
- Paul Hamm, gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
- Boxing analyst: "sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
- Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
- Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact, you can see it all over their faces."
- At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isnt that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
- Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
- Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them."
R: The snatch is my favorite comment.
T: Really?! Because my favorite is by far the kissing the balls comment.
R: Oh, I completely inappropriately laughed too loud at the snatch comment. I give complete respect to the balls comment, but I can just hear an announcer say "I saw her snatch." Still laughing, with tears now.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Weekly Predictions
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
R: The Olympics may have taken over my life. But now that Michael Phelps has become the greatest Olympian of all times and Nastia Liukin has shown the world she's better than Shawn Johnson, I think I can revert back to my regular scheduled programs.
T: Call me a Debbie Downer, but I am kinda over the Olympics. The good sports are winding down and now it is just the stupid sports - like badminton and table tennis and trampoline. Trampolinist - wanna be gymnast or divers who can't hack it?
R: Yes, but hopefully next Olympics we'll be in for Playground games, which is just ridiculous! I'm seriously considering hitting up a middle school during lunch for a quick round of Four Square.
America's Best Dance Crew
R: This is the finale! I believe Super Cr3w will beat out SoReal Cru, mainly because the judges have made it clear they don't want SoReal Cru to win. So with that, I pick Super Cr3w.
T: I pick SoReal Cru - these things never work out how the judges plan and someone had to pick them. Also, anyone interested in joining my 2 dance crews for next season, let me know. Sock N Sandals and Mom Jeans are now open for applications.
R: Can we do Sock N Sandals for the dance show and Mom Jeans for the Olympic Playground Games?
Project Runway
R: Kelli got the axe last week and that was a real shocker! So this week I'm gonna stick with Blayne. I think the lack of tanning bed will get to him mentally. He's already slowly losing his mind and I think this week will push him over the edge. And I predict that Daniel will punch Kenley in the face.
T: After Freak-Out-Bipolar-Joe's little tantrum last week, I have to wonder, is he going to self destruct and get himself kicked off? I hope not - he is fun to watch flip out. Let's go with Daniel - he is super whiny and "has perfect taste."
Shear Genius
R: We're down to the top four. I think one of the top two contestants will get the boot this week. So I pick Charlie because he annoys me.
T: As funny as I think it would be if she won, I think little Pixie blonde (Nicole) is due to be out this week. I am not really sure how she has made it this far...but if she makes it and Charlie and is in the bottom, he is going to have a mental meltdown and that is really the only reason to watch the show.
America's Greatest Dog
R: This show is ridiculous. I've never seen three crazier judges, and contestants willing to make their dog do anything for the title of America's Greatest Dog. I love my dog, but not enough to humiliate myself. With that said, I think Laurie and Andrew will be in the dog house this week. They've been slowly losing steam and Laurie just wants to be Andrew's foundation of trust. Too creepy in my opinion.
T: I am going to be honest, I have only seen the show once. I am not sure who is going to get kicked off, but I am sure that the judges are going to throw a little tantrum. I am pretty convinced the judges are runaways from the looney bin. They, in all seriousness and with straight faces, literally judged a doggie dance competition and doggie art work. Seriously people...it is one thing for a person to be obsessed with their dog and wanting to show them off...it is quite another to judge the doggie art.
The Hills
R: They're back! Audrina has been put in the garage and grows enough balls to tell Lo off! And it seems as if they're setting Lauren and Heidi up to be friends again. Except Heidi's sister is setting this up. (My question, why is Heidi's family obsessed with Lauren? It's almost creepy.) Could it be? Could Lauren actually make a complete circle of frienemies? I'm think...not during this lifetime.
T: Don't tell me what happens! I have it DVR'd! I spent my weekend watching old episodes and highlights and LC's memories. Can not explain to you my excitement...It looks like Audrina may grow a spine this season! Oh, and I predict that LC and Heidi do not make up...they just tease that for ratings.
R: The Olympics may have taken over my life. But now that Michael Phelps has become the greatest Olympian of all times and Nastia Liukin has shown the world she's better than Shawn Johnson, I think I can revert back to my regular scheduled programs.
T: Call me a Debbie Downer, but I am kinda over the Olympics. The good sports are winding down and now it is just the stupid sports - like badminton and table tennis and trampoline. Trampolinist - wanna be gymnast or divers who can't hack it?
R: Yes, but hopefully next Olympics we'll be in for Playground games, which is just ridiculous! I'm seriously considering hitting up a middle school during lunch for a quick round of Four Square.
America's Best Dance Crew
R: This is the finale! I believe Super Cr3w will beat out SoReal Cru, mainly because the judges have made it clear they don't want SoReal Cru to win. So with that, I pick Super Cr3w.
T: I pick SoReal Cru - these things never work out how the judges plan and someone had to pick them. Also, anyone interested in joining my 2 dance crews for next season, let me know. Sock N Sandals and Mom Jeans are now open for applications.
R: Can we do Sock N Sandals for the dance show and Mom Jeans for the Olympic Playground Games?
Project Runway
R: Kelli got the axe last week and that was a real shocker! So this week I'm gonna stick with Blayne. I think the lack of tanning bed will get to him mentally. He's already slowly losing his mind and I think this week will push him over the edge. And I predict that Daniel will punch Kenley in the face.
T: After Freak-Out-Bipolar-Joe's little tantrum last week, I have to wonder, is he going to self destruct and get himself kicked off? I hope not - he is fun to watch flip out. Let's go with Daniel - he is super whiny and "has perfect taste."
Shear Genius
R: We're down to the top four. I think one of the top two contestants will get the boot this week. So I pick Charlie because he annoys me.
T: As funny as I think it would be if she won, I think little Pixie blonde (Nicole) is due to be out this week. I am not really sure how she has made it this far...but if she makes it and Charlie and is in the bottom, he is going to have a mental meltdown and that is really the only reason to watch the show.
America's Greatest Dog
R: This show is ridiculous. I've never seen three crazier judges, and contestants willing to make their dog do anything for the title of America's Greatest Dog. I love my dog, but not enough to humiliate myself. With that said, I think Laurie and Andrew will be in the dog house this week. They've been slowly losing steam and Laurie just wants to be Andrew's foundation of trust. Too creepy in my opinion.
T: I am going to be honest, I have only seen the show once. I am not sure who is going to get kicked off, but I am sure that the judges are going to throw a little tantrum. I am pretty convinced the judges are runaways from the looney bin. They, in all seriousness and with straight faces, literally judged a doggie dance competition and doggie art work. Seriously people...it is one thing for a person to be obsessed with their dog and wanting to show them off...it is quite another to judge the doggie art.
The Hills
R: They're back! Audrina has been put in the garage and grows enough balls to tell Lo off! And it seems as if they're setting Lauren and Heidi up to be friends again. Except Heidi's sister is setting this up. (My question, why is Heidi's family obsessed with Lauren? It's almost creepy.) Could it be? Could Lauren actually make a complete circle of frienemies? I'm think...not during this lifetime.
T: Don't tell me what happens! I have it DVR'd! I spent my weekend watching old episodes and highlights and LC's memories. Can not explain to you my excitement...It looks like Audrina may grow a spine this season! Oh, and I predict that LC and Heidi do not make up...they just tease that for ratings.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Host Rankings
R: Because Stacy Roxx rocks here is our Bravo Host Ranking
T: They're not all hosts and we don't care. It's our blog and our ranking.
10. The metrosexual boys on Million Dollar Listing - seriously they're so hard to listen to their stupid ramblings
9. Slade from Date my Ex - so in love with Jo and she just enjoys toying with him
8. Bravo Reunion guy - can't say this enough, we want his job
7. Padma Laskmi from Top Chef - she doesn't cook and nobody cares
6. Jeff Lewis from Flipping Out - he freaks out even in his video diaries. Hilarious!
5. Rene "Hi hi" Fris from Shear Genius - quertastic and we heart him
4. Jaclyn Smith from Shear Genius - she thinks her show is serious and we find that hilarious!
3. Kathy Griffin from My Life on the D-list - very few things are funnier than this woman
2. Heidi Klum from Project Runway - two straight girls, and we still drool over her
and the number one Bravo Host is....
1. Tim Gunn from Project Runway - you can not top him, especially when he says "Holler at your boy."
T: They're not all hosts and we don't care. It's our blog and our ranking.
10. The metrosexual boys on Million Dollar Listing - seriously they're so hard to listen to their stupid ramblings
9. Slade from Date my Ex - so in love with Jo and she just enjoys toying with him
8. Bravo Reunion guy - can't say this enough, we want his job
7. Padma Laskmi from Top Chef - she doesn't cook and nobody cares
6. Jeff Lewis from Flipping Out - he freaks out even in his video diaries. Hilarious!
5. Rene "Hi hi" Fris from Shear Genius - quertastic and we heart him
4. Jaclyn Smith from Shear Genius - she thinks her show is serious and we find that hilarious!
3. Kathy Griffin from My Life on the D-list - very few things are funnier than this woman
2. Heidi Klum from Project Runway - two straight girls, and we still drool over her
and the number one Bravo Host is....
1. Tim Gunn from Project Runway - you can not top him, especially when he says "Holler at your boy."
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