Trixie: What the crap is up with Kenley not being sent home??? Honestly!!! I am starting to think that it is rigged. Why is she still here? She is rude, a one trick pony, annoying, and annoying. Tim Gunn, Heidi, and Nina deserve a LOT more respect than her yelling at them. If I was Heidi or Tim, I would have bitch slapped her by now. My theory: the producers realize she is the only hot girl and reason that boyfriends and husbands and lesbians watch the show, especially after that Kenley Spears outfit last night.
Roxie: I did not watch it. Who got kicked off? Who was in the bottom two? Is next week the finale? (Side note: this is so unlike me and normally I do not schedule anything on a Wednesday night but I had a fundraiser and though it's rare, I do find some things more important than Reality TV)
T: Do you want me to spoil it for you? Now they are down to 4. Not the finale.
R: Was it Suede? Please let it be Suede! You can ruin it for me. I won’t get to watch it till next week anyways. I didn’t DVR it.
T: Ok. It came down to Suede and Kenley and Suede got the boot. I completely disagreed with it.
R: You knew it was going to happen. Kenley won’t win, but she’s going to showcase her clothes. It’s a sad thing, but a must for ratings.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Weekly Predictions
Roxie: We're getting back to basics. Time for Weekly Predictions!
Trixie: First I need to get something off my chest. Heidi's fake birthday. I think I am more mad at TMZ for keeping these two around than I am at them for existing and sucking at life. Stop it! No one cares! And now I have wasted 5 minutes of my life on you that I will never get back. Have time to waste? See Heidi's fake birthday.
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
Project Runway
R: We're down to the final six. So, I believe this is when we're going to have to trim the fat and Suede is exactly that. Fat.
T: Please, God, let this week be the week that crazy bipolar freakout Joe gets the ax! I can not take another week of him and his cheap blue light special clothes. Awful, awful, awful. I have yet to see him do anything that even remotely resembles fashion and yet other people keep getting kicked off. HOW?
America's Next Top Model
R: It's so early in the season that this is hard. But this is make-over week so someone is going to mentally lose it because Tyra can't stand not being the prettiest one in the room. I think Clark looks too much like Kristin Cavallari and Tyra is all about Team LC. So long Clark!
T: I predict, shocking!, that Tyra makes some one get a pixie cut and they cry and look stupid and secretly hate Tyra for the rest of the show.
Real World Road Rule Challenge
R: I still don't understand the true premise of the game, but I'm going to assume the girls will be the first to go and who better than a newbie? I say Ashli is kicked off the island.
T: I refuse to come up with an original comment if MTV refuses to come up with an original concept.
Trixie: First I need to get something off my chest. Heidi's fake birthday. I think I am more mad at TMZ for keeping these two around than I am at them for existing and sucking at life. Stop it! No one cares! And now I have wasted 5 minutes of my life on you that I will never get back. Have time to waste? See Heidi's fake birthday.
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
Project Runway
R: We're down to the final six. So, I believe this is when we're going to have to trim the fat and Suede is exactly that. Fat.
T: Please, God, let this week be the week that crazy bipolar freakout Joe gets the ax! I can not take another week of him and his cheap blue light special clothes. Awful, awful, awful. I have yet to see him do anything that even remotely resembles fashion and yet other people keep getting kicked off. HOW?
America's Next Top Model
R: It's so early in the season that this is hard. But this is make-over week so someone is going to mentally lose it because Tyra can't stand not being the prettiest one in the room. I think Clark looks too much like Kristin Cavallari and Tyra is all about Team LC. So long Clark!
T: I predict, shocking!, that Tyra makes some one get a pixie cut and they cry and look stupid and secretly hate Tyra for the rest of the show.
Real World Road Rule Challenge
R: I still don't understand the true premise of the game, but I'm going to assume the girls will be the first to go and who better than a newbie? I say Ashli is kicked off the island.
T: I refuse to come up with an original comment if MTV refuses to come up with an original concept.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Wednesday Recap
Project Runway
R: Bye bye Blayne and your girlicious self. I do appreciate the fact that Blayne kept putting out crap after crap and made it this far. Clearly on personality only. Bye hateful Terri. Had you used Keith you might still be around. Then you could have rubbed it in Keith's face that you are infact better than him, that is no longer the case. And Kinley got a swift kick in the ego this episode. That should bring her down a notch or two.
T: Blayne, you had it coming. I heart you, you are ridiculous, but fashion is about more than tanning and using neon in every outfit. Terri, I don’t like Keith either but he could have really helped you. I blame you and you alone. I am sure the rest of your life you will continue to blame Keith. You are a sad, mean person and I kinda like it! Kinley is getting ballsy and bitchy and I would not assume to tell Hiedi Klum, a Victoria Secret model for the last bazillion years, where boobs are. I think she knows. And Nina Garcia, as crazy as she is, deserves SOME respect. She does afterall eat, breath, and sleep fashion. And don’t lie – you know what Dolce and Gabana looks like – it doesn’t change that much!
America's Next Top Model
R: Tranny was thisclose to getting kicked off ANTM. But of course, they must soak up all the tranniness that they can and she slid into the next round.
T: I predict that the Tranny stays around for atleast 3-5 more episodes. They will kick out the other girls who they know aren’t going to make it anyway, and then when it gets down to the Tranny vs. the girls with potential, they will have to kick shim off. Until then: Tranny Report!!!
America's Greatest Dog
R: The boxer won America’s Greatest Dog! Baffled! They did it for the twist. He won $250,000 for that! I think I’m going to enter.
T: I am so incredibly disappointed in this show. The boxer was cute – sure. The owner was AWFUL! As soon as I saw Galaxy get kicked off, I was over the show. Fixed and its obvious. Whatever… I am no longer admitting that show ever happened. Unless of course you go on it!
Road World/Real Rule Challenge
R: RW/RR Challenge is survivor meets MTV. I’m not crazy about it yet. I know MTV needed another setting and different rules, but it just feels like they couldn’t come up with anything original. And at this rate it’ll be a sausage fest before the half way point.
T: MTV can’t come up with anything. Why are you surprised that RW/RR Challenge is any different? I mean – the VMAs were so completely irrelevant this year that they had to get a no name from England to Host, Brit Brit to open, and I am sure had to pay all 3000 people who were there to show up and clap. I do have to give them credit for once again not giving Kanye West a VMA even though he is really the only person who cares about them anymore. Hilarious!
R: Bye bye Blayne and your girlicious self. I do appreciate the fact that Blayne kept putting out crap after crap and made it this far. Clearly on personality only. Bye hateful Terri. Had you used Keith you might still be around. Then you could have rubbed it in Keith's face that you are infact better than him, that is no longer the case. And Kinley got a swift kick in the ego this episode. That should bring her down a notch or two.
T: Blayne, you had it coming. I heart you, you are ridiculous, but fashion is about more than tanning and using neon in every outfit. Terri, I don’t like Keith either but he could have really helped you. I blame you and you alone. I am sure the rest of your life you will continue to blame Keith. You are a sad, mean person and I kinda like it! Kinley is getting ballsy and bitchy and I would not assume to tell Hiedi Klum, a Victoria Secret model for the last bazillion years, where boobs are. I think she knows. And Nina Garcia, as crazy as she is, deserves SOME respect. She does afterall eat, breath, and sleep fashion. And don’t lie – you know what Dolce and Gabana looks like – it doesn’t change that much!
America's Next Top Model
R: Tranny was thisclose to getting kicked off ANTM. But of course, they must soak up all the tranniness that they can and she slid into the next round.
T: I predict that the Tranny stays around for atleast 3-5 more episodes. They will kick out the other girls who they know aren’t going to make it anyway, and then when it gets down to the Tranny vs. the girls with potential, they will have to kick shim off. Until then: Tranny Report!!!
America's Greatest Dog
R: The boxer won America’s Greatest Dog! Baffled! They did it for the twist. He won $250,000 for that! I think I’m going to enter.
T: I am so incredibly disappointed in this show. The boxer was cute – sure. The owner was AWFUL! As soon as I saw Galaxy get kicked off, I was over the show. Fixed and its obvious. Whatever… I am no longer admitting that show ever happened. Unless of course you go on it!
Road World/Real Rule Challenge
R: RW/RR Challenge is survivor meets MTV. I’m not crazy about it yet. I know MTV needed another setting and different rules, but it just feels like they couldn’t come up with anything original. And at this rate it’ll be a sausage fest before the half way point.
T: MTV can’t come up with anything. Why are you surprised that RW/RR Challenge is any different? I mean – the VMAs were so completely irrelevant this year that they had to get a no name from England to Host, Brit Brit to open, and I am sure had to pay all 3000 people who were there to show up and clap. I do have to give them credit for once again not giving Kanye West a VMA even though he is really the only person who cares about them anymore. Hilarious!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
What has big hair and can't lip synch?
We were lucky enough to have this video forwarded from our new corespondent Mitzi.
M: I'm not even sure there are enough bullets in the world to put me out of my misery after wathing this! I'm definitely on team LC.
T: How could you ever be on team spiedi? He has transparent facial hair and big fake teeth and she literally is mentally retarded.
M: I can't tell if the sound is just off or if she is mouthing different words than the lyrics all together.
R: Why is the video 10 minutes long? How did she convince people to participate in this? Why is there a shot of a guy playing with his happy trail? This is disturbing. I'm team Lo. She's the only one not mentally retarded.
T: You are team Lo?!?! She is not mentally retarded but a gigantor bitch! I am going to be team Audrina if you are gong to be team Lo! Maybe team Whitney.
R: And a hilarious bitch at that one! Audrina sucks! She's so ditzy! And its taken her four seasons to grow balls.
T: First of all, Audrina is less ditzy than LC. Second, I think she has always had balls they just never showed her using them. She has always done whatever she wanted (hello dating Justin Bobby even though no one liked him). I am truly hurt that you are team Lo!
R: I can tell you taking this very personally. Aurdina could never hold her own show. Lo could and should have her own show. She says things that everyone else is thinking. Audrina is getting ballieser but against the wrong people. I do enjoy Whitney fully and am 100% on her team.
T: Back to the video. Where to begin....
Spencer did her hair and so automatically you know it is going to be horrible
R: I thought that was a wig!
T: Why did they do an 80's workout video? It makes no sense
R: My exact thoughts as well. Overdosin' so we'll work out? And it's weird that the girl in the two braids always makes angry faces at the camera. Although, I would too if I were in a Heidi video.
T: Is she lip syncing? Is her voice really worse than that?? And are they so poor they couldn't find someone better?
R: I have no idea what she's doing. I actually thought they put the wrong son to this video since she's obvisously mouthing something and it doesn't make sense to the video.
T: Why is it 10 minutes long when the sound only last 4? No one wants to see her dance like that!
R: It's quite strange. It just keeps going and going and going. I didn't watch the whole thing because I wanted to think when I was done watching it.
T: Do they really think people like them? Or are they just milking it until it lasts? Either way, I hate them, but it is king of genius. I would love to be in their brainstorming sessions. "How to annoy LC this week so we can stay relevant on the show. I know! Let's 'crash' our sister's birthday party so she will feel awkward!" "and then! Let's release the weirdest 80's video ever produced on You tube!" "Brillant! Now, let's go bleach our hair and facial hair and bleach our big fake teeth."
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Why Roxie and Trixie love the Olympics!
Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentataors so far during the Olympics that they would like to take back:
- Weight-lifting commentator: "This is Gregorieva from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
- Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
- Paul Hamm, gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
- Boxing analyst: "sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
- Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
- Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact, you can see it all over their faces."
- At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isnt that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
- Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
- Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them."
R: The snatch is my favorite comment.
T: Really?! Because my favorite is by far the kissing the balls comment.
R: Oh, I completely inappropriately laughed too loud at the snatch comment. I give complete respect to the balls comment, but I can just hear an announcer say "I saw her snatch." Still laughing, with tears now.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Weekly Predictions
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
R: The Olympics may have taken over my life. But now that Michael Phelps has become the greatest Olympian of all times and Nastia Liukin has shown the world she's better than Shawn Johnson, I think I can revert back to my regular scheduled programs.
T: Call me a Debbie Downer, but I am kinda over the Olympics. The good sports are winding down and now it is just the stupid sports - like badminton and table tennis and trampoline. Trampolinist - wanna be gymnast or divers who can't hack it?
R: Yes, but hopefully next Olympics we'll be in for Playground games, which is just ridiculous! I'm seriously considering hitting up a middle school during lunch for a quick round of Four Square.
America's Best Dance Crew
R: This is the finale! I believe Super Cr3w will beat out SoReal Cru, mainly because the judges have made it clear they don't want SoReal Cru to win. So with that, I pick Super Cr3w.
T: I pick SoReal Cru - these things never work out how the judges plan and someone had to pick them. Also, anyone interested in joining my 2 dance crews for next season, let me know. Sock N Sandals and Mom Jeans are now open for applications.
R: Can we do Sock N Sandals for the dance show and Mom Jeans for the Olympic Playground Games?
Project Runway
R: Kelli got the axe last week and that was a real shocker! So this week I'm gonna stick with Blayne. I think the lack of tanning bed will get to him mentally. He's already slowly losing his mind and I think this week will push him over the edge. And I predict that Daniel will punch Kenley in the face.
T: After Freak-Out-Bipolar-Joe's little tantrum last week, I have to wonder, is he going to self destruct and get himself kicked off? I hope not - he is fun to watch flip out. Let's go with Daniel - he is super whiny and "has perfect taste."
Shear Genius
R: We're down to the top four. I think one of the top two contestants will get the boot this week. So I pick Charlie because he annoys me.
T: As funny as I think it would be if she won, I think little Pixie blonde (Nicole) is due to be out this week. I am not really sure how she has made it this far...but if she makes it and Charlie and is in the bottom, he is going to have a mental meltdown and that is really the only reason to watch the show.
America's Greatest Dog
R: This show is ridiculous. I've never seen three crazier judges, and contestants willing to make their dog do anything for the title of America's Greatest Dog. I love my dog, but not enough to humiliate myself. With that said, I think Laurie and Andrew will be in the dog house this week. They've been slowly losing steam and Laurie just wants to be Andrew's foundation of trust. Too creepy in my opinion.
T: I am going to be honest, I have only seen the show once. I am not sure who is going to get kicked off, but I am sure that the judges are going to throw a little tantrum. I am pretty convinced the judges are runaways from the looney bin. They, in all seriousness and with straight faces, literally judged a doggie dance competition and doggie art work. Seriously people...it is one thing for a person to be obsessed with their dog and wanting to show them off...it is quite another to judge the doggie art.
The Hills
R: They're back! Audrina has been put in the garage and grows enough balls to tell Lo off! And it seems as if they're setting Lauren and Heidi up to be friends again. Except Heidi's sister is setting this up. (My question, why is Heidi's family obsessed with Lauren? It's almost creepy.) Could it be? Could Lauren actually make a complete circle of frienemies? I'm think...not during this lifetime.
T: Don't tell me what happens! I have it DVR'd! I spent my weekend watching old episodes and highlights and LC's memories. Can not explain to you my excitement...It looks like Audrina may grow a spine this season! Oh, and I predict that LC and Heidi do not make up...they just tease that for ratings.
R: The Olympics may have taken over my life. But now that Michael Phelps has become the greatest Olympian of all times and Nastia Liukin has shown the world she's better than Shawn Johnson, I think I can revert back to my regular scheduled programs.
T: Call me a Debbie Downer, but I am kinda over the Olympics. The good sports are winding down and now it is just the stupid sports - like badminton and table tennis and trampoline. Trampolinist - wanna be gymnast or divers who can't hack it?
R: Yes, but hopefully next Olympics we'll be in for Playground games, which is just ridiculous! I'm seriously considering hitting up a middle school during lunch for a quick round of Four Square.
America's Best Dance Crew
R: This is the finale! I believe Super Cr3w will beat out SoReal Cru, mainly because the judges have made it clear they don't want SoReal Cru to win. So with that, I pick Super Cr3w.
T: I pick SoReal Cru - these things never work out how the judges plan and someone had to pick them. Also, anyone interested in joining my 2 dance crews for next season, let me know. Sock N Sandals and Mom Jeans are now open for applications.
R: Can we do Sock N Sandals for the dance show and Mom Jeans for the Olympic Playground Games?
Project Runway
R: Kelli got the axe last week and that was a real shocker! So this week I'm gonna stick with Blayne. I think the lack of tanning bed will get to him mentally. He's already slowly losing his mind and I think this week will push him over the edge. And I predict that Daniel will punch Kenley in the face.
T: After Freak-Out-Bipolar-Joe's little tantrum last week, I have to wonder, is he going to self destruct and get himself kicked off? I hope not - he is fun to watch flip out. Let's go with Daniel - he is super whiny and "has perfect taste."
Shear Genius
R: We're down to the top four. I think one of the top two contestants will get the boot this week. So I pick Charlie because he annoys me.
T: As funny as I think it would be if she won, I think little Pixie blonde (Nicole) is due to be out this week. I am not really sure how she has made it this far...but if she makes it and Charlie and is in the bottom, he is going to have a mental meltdown and that is really the only reason to watch the show.
America's Greatest Dog
R: This show is ridiculous. I've never seen three crazier judges, and contestants willing to make their dog do anything for the title of America's Greatest Dog. I love my dog, but not enough to humiliate myself. With that said, I think Laurie and Andrew will be in the dog house this week. They've been slowly losing steam and Laurie just wants to be Andrew's foundation of trust. Too creepy in my opinion.
T: I am going to be honest, I have only seen the show once. I am not sure who is going to get kicked off, but I am sure that the judges are going to throw a little tantrum. I am pretty convinced the judges are runaways from the looney bin. They, in all seriousness and with straight faces, literally judged a doggie dance competition and doggie art work. Seriously people...it is one thing for a person to be obsessed with their dog and wanting to show them off...it is quite another to judge the doggie art.
The Hills
R: They're back! Audrina has been put in the garage and grows enough balls to tell Lo off! And it seems as if they're setting Lauren and Heidi up to be friends again. Except Heidi's sister is setting this up. (My question, why is Heidi's family obsessed with Lauren? It's almost creepy.) Could it be? Could Lauren actually make a complete circle of frienemies? I'm think...not during this lifetime.
T: Don't tell me what happens! I have it DVR'd! I spent my weekend watching old episodes and highlights and LC's memories. Can not explain to you my excitement...It looks like Audrina may grow a spine this season! Oh, and I predict that LC and Heidi do not make up...they just tease that for ratings.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Host Rankings
R: Because Stacy Roxx rocks here is our Bravo Host Ranking
T: They're not all hosts and we don't care. It's our blog and our ranking.
10. The metrosexual boys on Million Dollar Listing - seriously they're so hard to listen to their stupid ramblings
9. Slade from Date my Ex - so in love with Jo and she just enjoys toying with him
8. Bravo Reunion guy - can't say this enough, we want his job
7. Padma Laskmi from Top Chef - she doesn't cook and nobody cares
6. Jeff Lewis from Flipping Out - he freaks out even in his video diaries. Hilarious!
5. Rene "Hi hi" Fris from Shear Genius - quertastic and we heart him
4. Jaclyn Smith from Shear Genius - she thinks her show is serious and we find that hilarious!
3. Kathy Griffin from My Life on the D-list - very few things are funnier than this woman
2. Heidi Klum from Project Runway - two straight girls, and we still drool over her
and the number one Bravo Host is....
1. Tim Gunn from Project Runway - you can not top him, especially when he says "Holler at your boy."
T: They're not all hosts and we don't care. It's our blog and our ranking.
10. The metrosexual boys on Million Dollar Listing - seriously they're so hard to listen to their stupid ramblings
9. Slade from Date my Ex - so in love with Jo and she just enjoys toying with him
8. Bravo Reunion guy - can't say this enough, we want his job
7. Padma Laskmi from Top Chef - she doesn't cook and nobody cares
6. Jeff Lewis from Flipping Out - he freaks out even in his video diaries. Hilarious!
5. Rene "Hi hi" Fris from Shear Genius - quertastic and we heart him
4. Jaclyn Smith from Shear Genius - she thinks her show is serious and we find that hilarious!
3. Kathy Griffin from My Life on the D-list - very few things are funnier than this woman
2. Heidi Klum from Project Runway - two straight girls, and we still drool over her
and the number one Bravo Host is....
1. Tim Gunn from Project Runway - you can not top him, especially when he says "Holler at your boy."
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Paris For President
You didn't think we could just let this go did you?
T: I would like to point out that this is probably the best thing Paris has ever said or done.
R: Best line of the year? "See you at the debate, bitches!"
T: Painting the White House Pink is the best idea I have heard in the campaigns yet!
Paris, you have our votes!
See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die
T: I would like to point out that this is probably the best thing Paris has ever said or done.
R: Best line of the year? "See you at the debate, bitches!"
T: Painting the White House Pink is the best idea I have heard in the campaigns yet!
Paris, you have our votes!
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Holler at your boy
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
America's Best Dance Crew
T: As most of you know, I don't watch this show. I am going to stick with Fanny Pak - it is a stupid accessory and even more stupid dance name! Why not name themselves the Jorts (jean shorts for those of you not in the know) or the Mullets. How about Socks and Sandals! From now one, my dance crew name is Socks and Sandals.
R: Since I do watch this show and I do know that next week is 80's week that means Fanny Pak better bring it! I believe if they don't match the judges expectations they'll be gone. And since last week was their best week ever, I say Fanny Pak is out of here!
Flipping Out
T: I predict a total meltdown. With only 2 minions to yell at, and 1 ex/biz partner who has started to realize he has an opinion and spine, I bet Jeff Lewis just completely looses it. I can't wait!!
R: I do believe this will be the episode that makes Jeff certifiably insane. Then Jenni will work for Ryan and they'll be bitter exes and business partners. Or Jeff will just scream for no reason because someone didn't bring him guacamole.
Project Runway
T: I want to say fake little tan boy will be leaving, but then I'm afraid we may never hear Tim Gun say "Holler at your boy" ever again. So I am going to say little mousy girl who should have been kicked off last week.
R: Blayne has turned crazy and if I hear "licious"-anything, I'm going to shoot him through the TV. I want Blayne gone, but I think it'll be Terri, because she hasn't been featured until last week and almost won so this week she'll bomb and be outta here!
Shear Genius
T: I think it would be funny if the gossiping fat gay guy got kicked off. It is much more dramatic when one of the favorites leaves early.
R: While Charlie is losing steam, I need Nekisa to leave before I want to shave my head bald. Seriously, she's horrible!
Date My Ex
T: I think Jo will try to sing one of her new songs on a date and the guy will have act like she's good so he thinks he has a chance to get into bed with her!
R: My prediction, Jo does Slade before the end of the series and that's the surprise ending.
Have a show you want us to predict? Let us know!
America's Best Dance Crew
T: As most of you know, I don't watch this show. I am going to stick with Fanny Pak - it is a stupid accessory and even more stupid dance name! Why not name themselves the Jorts (jean shorts for those of you not in the know) or the Mullets. How about Socks and Sandals! From now one, my dance crew name is Socks and Sandals.
R: Since I do watch this show and I do know that next week is 80's week that means Fanny Pak better bring it! I believe if they don't match the judges expectations they'll be gone. And since last week was their best week ever, I say Fanny Pak is out of here!
Flipping Out
T: I predict a total meltdown. With only 2 minions to yell at, and 1 ex/biz partner who has started to realize he has an opinion and spine, I bet Jeff Lewis just completely looses it. I can't wait!!
R: I do believe this will be the episode that makes Jeff certifiably insane. Then Jenni will work for Ryan and they'll be bitter exes and business partners. Or Jeff will just scream for no reason because someone didn't bring him guacamole.
Project Runway
T: I want to say fake little tan boy will be leaving, but then I'm afraid we may never hear Tim Gun say "Holler at your boy" ever again. So I am going to say little mousy girl who should have been kicked off last week.
R: Blayne has turned crazy and if I hear "licious"-anything, I'm going to shoot him through the TV. I want Blayne gone, but I think it'll be Terri, because she hasn't been featured until last week and almost won so this week she'll bomb and be outta here!
Shear Genius
T: I think it would be funny if the gossiping fat gay guy got kicked off. It is much more dramatic when one of the favorites leaves early.
R: While Charlie is losing steam, I need Nekisa to leave before I want to shave my head bald. Seriously, she's horrible!
Date My Ex
T: I think Jo will try to sing one of her new songs on a date and the guy will have act like she's good so he thinks he has a chance to get into bed with her!
R: My prediction, Jo does Slade before the end of the series and that's the surprise ending.
Have a show you want us to predict? Let us know!
Monday, August 4, 2008
Brangelina
Trixie and Roxie discuss the Brangelina Twins...
T: So how jipped do you think People feels about the Brangelina baby pictures?
R: I haven't seen them. What?
T: They paid $14 mil for pics and the cover barely even shows their faces; one you can only see the top of their head! And to boot! They can't even call them Brangelina anymore. That is their official name!
R: For $14 mil there better be baby behinds splashed on that page!
T: So how jipped do you think People feels about the Brangelina baby pictures?
R: I haven't seen them. What?
T: They paid $14 mil for pics and the cover barely even shows their faces; one you can only see the top of their head! And to boot! They can't even call them Brangelina anymore. That is their official name!
R: For $14 mil there better be baby behinds splashed on that page!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Question from the Audience
Will Jo and Slade make it? Or will the show cancel bc they completely stop talking? - Anonymous
T: Great question! Let's recap for our viewers who don’t know who Jo and Slade are. Jo and Slade originally appeared on Real Housewives of Orange County – a great piece of Reality TV in its own right. Slade is a rich, kinda slimy controlling fiancé, and Jo was his kept fiancé, who then decided she wanted to continue her single/partying ways. While sometimes uncomfortable to watch, it made for great TV! They broke up, and now have their own spinoff show. So now Slade is pimping out Jo – and I am not sure they aren’t hooking up on the side too.
R: Let's be honest, Jo is trying to get an album deal - therefore she's sleeping with anyone who is willing to produce her album and I believe Slade is top producer. Will their show get canceled? Nah, it'll run through its season. The real question, will it get picked up for a second season? My prediction - Jo gets her own Reality TV show of her trying to make it as an artist and Slade will end up dating a D list celebrity to get some news buzzing around him.
T: The basis of the show is their dysfunctional relationship. The more dysfunctional, the more air time they get. So will Jo and Slade the couple make it? Absolutely not. They get off on being mad at each other and then making up – always have. But will the show get cancelled because of it? Absolutely not! That is the whole show! Knowing their luck and talent at spinning their situations, they’ll probably get a 3rd show from it! Genius!
T: Great question! Let's recap for our viewers who don’t know who Jo and Slade are. Jo and Slade originally appeared on Real Housewives of Orange County – a great piece of Reality TV in its own right. Slade is a rich, kinda slimy controlling fiancé, and Jo was his kept fiancé, who then decided she wanted to continue her single/partying ways. While sometimes uncomfortable to watch, it made for great TV! They broke up, and now have their own spinoff show. So now Slade is pimping out Jo – and I am not sure they aren’t hooking up on the side too.
R: Let's be honest, Jo is trying to get an album deal - therefore she's sleeping with anyone who is willing to produce her album and I believe Slade is top producer. Will their show get canceled? Nah, it'll run through its season. The real question, will it get picked up for a second season? My prediction - Jo gets her own Reality TV show of her trying to make it as an artist and Slade will end up dating a D list celebrity to get some news buzzing around him.
T: The basis of the show is their dysfunctional relationship. The more dysfunctional, the more air time they get. So will Jo and Slade the couple make it? Absolutely not. They get off on being mad at each other and then making up – always have. But will the show get cancelled because of it? Absolutely not! That is the whole show! Knowing their luck and talent at spinning their situations, they’ll probably get a 3rd show from it! Genius!
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Weekly Predictions
Who's not going to make a Reality TV name for themselves this week?
America's Best Dance Crew:
R: Fanny Pak - the 80's crew who just didn't get last week's prop challenge
T: I am gonna say Fanny Pak, and rightfully so. What a stupid name for a dance crew.
Flipping Out
R: Can you believe someone quits?! Thank god! I think it'll be the new guy Chris. He's seemed pretty freaked out by the nanny cam and not having Jeff's support.
T: I think Jenny quits. A failed marriage to a loser, an asshole boss...Jenny, listen to me. Get out while you still can!
Project Runway
R: This is hard since it's so early in the season, but I think Stella, mainly because her voice annoys me.
T: It's too early in the season for me to remember who anyone is. I am going to say the New Jersey man/lady who just wants to use leather.
Shear Genius
R: Nekisa - she been scrapping by and having a faux lesbian relationship. Time to go!
T: I think it will be Paulo who won last week. He was in the bottom the whole time, finally won (with no immunity), and now he is outta there!
Have a show you want us to predict? Let us know!
America's Best Dance Crew:
R: Fanny Pak - the 80's crew who just didn't get last week's prop challenge
T: I am gonna say Fanny Pak, and rightfully so. What a stupid name for a dance crew.
Flipping Out
R: Can you believe someone quits?! Thank god! I think it'll be the new guy Chris. He's seemed pretty freaked out by the nanny cam and not having Jeff's support.
T: I think Jenny quits. A failed marriage to a loser, an asshole boss...Jenny, listen to me. Get out while you still can!
Project Runway
R: This is hard since it's so early in the season, but I think Stella, mainly because her voice annoys me.
T: It's too early in the season for me to remember who anyone is. I am going to say the New Jersey man/lady who just wants to use leather.
Shear Genius
R: Nekisa - she been scrapping by and having a faux lesbian relationship. Time to go!
T: I think it will be Paulo who won last week. He was in the bottom the whole time, finally won (with no immunity), and now he is outta there!
Have a show you want us to predict? Let us know!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Question from the Audience
Is Lauren Conrad a best frenemy or just a best friend hopper? - S. Smith
T: Thanks for the question, S. Smith. We actually get asked this a lot, so lets address this now. A frenemy is someone who is a friend and then turns into an enemy. A best friend hopper has a new best friend every other time you see them, or in the case of Reality TV, every season. Personally, I think LC is both. She is an amazing frenemy – no matter what the other person does or doesn’t do, LC also comes out smelling like roses. Lets be honest, b**ch can hold a grudge. Don’t even get me started on her best friends! Stephen, Lo, Heidi, Audrina, Brody – whoever will stick up for her against her newest frenemy is her BFF.
Both – LC is both.
R: Isn't the bigger question, how can Heidi Montag be selling more clothes than LC? How do either of them have a clothing line? I have to hand it to LC she is one of my Reality TV inspiration. And to answer the original question - best frenemy and best friend hopper.
T: Thanks for the question, S. Smith. We actually get asked this a lot, so lets address this now. A frenemy is someone who is a friend and then turns into an enemy. A best friend hopper has a new best friend every other time you see them, or in the case of Reality TV, every season. Personally, I think LC is both. She is an amazing frenemy – no matter what the other person does or doesn’t do, LC also comes out smelling like roses. Lets be honest, b**ch can hold a grudge. Don’t even get me started on her best friends! Stephen, Lo, Heidi, Audrina, Brody – whoever will stick up for her against her newest frenemy is her BFF.
Both – LC is both.
R: Isn't the bigger question, how can Heidi Montag be selling more clothes than LC? How do either of them have a clothing line? I have to hand it to LC she is one of my Reality TV inspiration. And to answer the original question - best frenemy and best friend hopper.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Roxie and Trixie Interview a Guy Who Knows 2 People On Reality TV Shows
T: We recently discovered that a friend of ours knows not one, but 2 Reality TV stars.
R: AND they aren't us. Also, we use the term "stars" loosely.
T: Hey! They were on Reality TV - thus stars. Don't judge! Don't be a Debbie Downer to our 1st guest!
R: Point taken. I stand corrected.
So, Guy Who Knows 2 People on Reality TV Shows (GWK2PORTS), how privileged do you feel to know not one, but 2 people on Reality TV? Would you say Very or Extremely?
I'd say very?
R: how come its not extremely
I knew them before they were stars. Plus I have seen both of them extremely intoxicated... so
How has it changed your life to know 2 people who have been on Reality TV?
Greatly - I realized that people can get lucky without any talent whatsoever... That's really changed my life
R: So it's motivated you?
Clearly...
How have they changed since being on Reality TV?
They don't live in AR anymore. They have their own websites. (GWK2Ports offers to give us an exclusive link to their web sites)
They are rich, but they were both rich before. But they are definitely both more rich now...
Do you consider them Reality TV actors, real actors, or real people? How do they see themselves?
Um... I would consider Jeff a real actor and Rossi a real person... I think they see themselves the exact same way.
T: So, tell us, exactly what work have your friends done that our fans would recognize?
Rossi was on Temptation Island and Blind Date and the host of several shows like Junkyard yards and Movie and a Makeover.
Jeff Pride was on Blind Date, Passions, and commercials (Kia, Long John Silvers, Michelob).
They most definitely got their acting work based off of their roles on Reality TV.
R: Thanks for joining us this morning. We know it is very early where you are.
T: There you have it folks, real people and real actors who are now rich living in LA... all because of Reality TV. What an inspiration!
R: AND they aren't us. Also, we use the term "stars" loosely.
T: Hey! They were on Reality TV - thus stars. Don't judge! Don't be a Debbie Downer to our 1st guest!
R: Point taken. I stand corrected.
So, Guy Who Knows 2 People on Reality TV Shows (GWK2PORTS), how privileged do you feel to know not one, but 2 people on Reality TV? Would you say Very or Extremely?
I'd say very?
R: how come its not extremely
I knew them before they were stars. Plus I have seen both of them extremely intoxicated... so
How has it changed your life to know 2 people who have been on Reality TV?
Greatly - I realized that people can get lucky without any talent whatsoever... That's really changed my life
R: So it's motivated you?
Clearly...
How have they changed since being on Reality TV?
They don't live in AR anymore. They have their own websites. (GWK2Ports offers to give us an exclusive link to their web sites)
They are rich, but they were both rich before. But they are definitely both more rich now...
Do you consider them Reality TV actors, real actors, or real people? How do they see themselves?
Um... I would consider Jeff a real actor and Rossi a real person... I think they see themselves the exact same way.
T: So, tell us, exactly what work have your friends done that our fans would recognize?
Rossi was on Temptation Island and Blind Date and the host of several shows like Junkyard yards and Movie and a Makeover.
Jeff Pride was on Blind Date, Passions, and commercials (Kia, Long John Silvers, Michelob).
They most definitely got their acting work based off of their roles on Reality TV.
R: Thanks for joining us this morning. We know it is very early where you are.
T: There you have it folks, real people and real actors who are now rich living in LA... all because of Reality TV. What an inspiration!
Friday, July 25, 2008
Roxie Interviews Trixie
Kathy Griffin recently bought a school to out do Oprah. You are now required to start a school. Where will you school be and what's it's name?
I am going to go "un-celebrity PC" and help the kids right here in the good 'ole USA. I think I will put it in Charleston because I like the beach, there are less hurricanes there than California - don't get me started. I will name it"The School of Social Education". Kids go there to learn how to behave in social situations, social etiquette, broaden their horizons (no LAN parties, no Dungeons and Dragons, no spelling bees). They will learn how to be "cool kids" and interact with people. We will have continuing education for refresher courses (how to date, how to not be a creepy creeperson, etc) as well as adult education classes (proper haircut and styles and you, dressing like an adult, how to behave when drunk). I am doing the world a favor!
You just found out that you're having sextuplets. You can only ask Kate Gosslin one question. What would it be?
"Hey Kate, whats six more, really? You'll hardly notice a difference."
The most recent Bachelor (you know the british one) just broke off his fake engagement to that actress. Why do you think the Bachelor has such poor luck on making a love connection?
Because the producers at The Bachelor pick guys who aren't really looking for a wife, they are looking to date 25 hotties on TV and get their name and face in magazines. There is no harm in that, but lets not pretend they are looking for love. If they were, they would not ask girls whose fathers tell them "my daughter is an actress and a whore, get out while you can". Lets call it what it is "Pretty People Getting Drunk and Making Out"
What would your reality show be called and why?
Will Work for Shoes - because, literally I think I do
Talks with Trixi T and R - get it, R and R, but T and R.
This requires more brainstorming!
Mario Lopez is this year's People's hottest bachelor. Agree? And how do you feel about Katrina Smirnoff?
No I don't agree! And his name is AC Slater! I don't care how many dancing shows he is on, he will ALWAYS be AC Slater. Can we all flashback to when he had a gerry curl mullet?? I don't care what you do after that; that officially negates you from ever being the hottest anything. Even on meth, in a coma, or blind, anyone in their right mind would never think AC Slater is hotter than say, George Clooney (who yes, is now single!), ok now I see why he made it. Literally, ALL the good ones are taken! All I have to say is, who is his publicist who got him on this list and can I have her number.
As far as Katrina Smirnoff... she is an over-tanned, weirdly toned, troll. Her only claim to fame is that she slept with AC Slater, and that is sad. She slept her way onto the G - List. Way to go!
I am going to go "un-celebrity PC" and help the kids right here in the good 'ole USA. I think I will put it in Charleston because I like the beach, there are less hurricanes there than California - don't get me started. I will name it"The School of Social Education". Kids go there to learn how to behave in social situations, social etiquette, broaden their horizons (no LAN parties, no Dungeons and Dragons, no spelling bees). They will learn how to be "cool kids" and interact with people. We will have continuing education for refresher courses (how to date, how to not be a creepy creeperson, etc) as well as adult education classes (proper haircut and styles and you, dressing like an adult, how to behave when drunk). I am doing the world a favor!
You just found out that you're having sextuplets. You can only ask Kate Gosslin one question. What would it be?
"Hey Kate, whats six more, really? You'll hardly notice a difference."
The most recent Bachelor (you know the british one) just broke off his fake engagement to that actress. Why do you think the Bachelor has such poor luck on making a love connection?
Because the producers at The Bachelor pick guys who aren't really looking for a wife, they are looking to date 25 hotties on TV and get their name and face in magazines. There is no harm in that, but lets not pretend they are looking for love. If they were, they would not ask girls whose fathers tell them "my daughter is an actress and a whore, get out while you can". Lets call it what it is "Pretty People Getting Drunk and Making Out"
What would your reality show be called and why?
Will Work for Shoes - because, literally I think I do
Talks with Trixi T and R - get it, R and R, but T and R.
This requires more brainstorming!
Mario Lopez is this year's People's hottest bachelor. Agree? And how do you feel about Katrina Smirnoff?
No I don't agree! And his name is AC Slater! I don't care how many dancing shows he is on, he will ALWAYS be AC Slater. Can we all flashback to when he had a gerry curl mullet?? I don't care what you do after that; that officially negates you from ever being the hottest anything. Even on meth, in a coma, or blind, anyone in their right mind would never think AC Slater is hotter than say, George Clooney (who yes, is now single!), ok now I see why he made it. Literally, ALL the good ones are taken! All I have to say is, who is his publicist who got him on this list and can I have her number.
As far as Katrina Smirnoff... she is an over-tanned, weirdly toned, troll. Her only claim to fame is that she slept with AC Slater, and that is sad. She slept her way onto the G - List. Way to go!
Trixie Interviews Roxie
Trixie Interviews Roxie:
Which is a stupider baby name: Sunday, Apple, or Pilot? Followup: What do you think about selling baby pictures to magazines?
Can I choose what Penn Jillete (of Penn and Teller the magicians) named his daughter? Moxie CrimeFighter. Seriously. That's just wrong.
I'm all for making some money off those baby pictures. If the magazines are willing to shell it out and people are willing to pay for the magazines might as well start making money off those babies since they cost a bazillion dollars to raise!
Why reality TV? Why not game shows, or theatre or film? Why reality tv?
Games shows go out of style and have no drama. I do enjoy live theatre but that costs money and most of the time I don’t have that. Film, blah on film. Movies suck. So that leaves reality tv. It’s a phenomena and I fully enjoy most of it.
Trista and her fake husband’s wedding… Touching or selling out? Honestly, was it too much pink? If so, was it Trista’s doing or ABCs cruel joke for making them stoop to her level and tape her wedding?
That was such a train wreck to watch! I was embarrassed for her! I’m pretty sure ABC had interns draw straws and the short straw had to design the wedding. And that’s what we got. How annoying was it when Trista kept talking about how this wedding was pulling her family apart; seriously whore you got a million dollar wedding for being on a dating show. Hush.
Star Jones’ divorce – doomed from the beginning because she married a gay man, or kharma for having her wedding brought to you by every brand imaginable?
Karma for not admitting she had her stomach stapled and claim it was diet and exercise. Bitch we know you couldn’t do that or you would’ve done it before the wedding.
Which show would you want to host: The Soup, Chelsea Lately, Biggest Loser, a Japanese Game Show?
This is a tough choice. Can I sit on Chelsea Handler’s panel of Chelsea lately and make fun of everyone and then actually host the Biggest Loser?? OR the Japanese Game Show?? Hmm… I choose The Soup because I could talk about all my shows and get my face on television. The Soup is my final answer.
Which is a stupider baby name: Sunday, Apple, or Pilot? Followup: What do you think about selling baby pictures to magazines?
Can I choose what Penn Jillete (of Penn and Teller the magicians) named his daughter? Moxie CrimeFighter. Seriously. That's just wrong.
I'm all for making some money off those baby pictures. If the magazines are willing to shell it out and people are willing to pay for the magazines might as well start making money off those babies since they cost a bazillion dollars to raise!
Why reality TV? Why not game shows, or theatre or film? Why reality tv?
Games shows go out of style and have no drama. I do enjoy live theatre but that costs money and most of the time I don’t have that. Film, blah on film. Movies suck. So that leaves reality tv. It’s a phenomena and I fully enjoy most of it.
Trista and her fake husband’s wedding… Touching or selling out? Honestly, was it too much pink? If so, was it Trista’s doing or ABCs cruel joke for making them stoop to her level and tape her wedding?
That was such a train wreck to watch! I was embarrassed for her! I’m pretty sure ABC had interns draw straws and the short straw had to design the wedding. And that’s what we got. How annoying was it when Trista kept talking about how this wedding was pulling her family apart; seriously whore you got a million dollar wedding for being on a dating show. Hush.
Star Jones’ divorce – doomed from the beginning because she married a gay man, or kharma for having her wedding brought to you by every brand imaginable?
Karma for not admitting she had her stomach stapled and claim it was diet and exercise. Bitch we know you couldn’t do that or you would’ve done it before the wedding.
Which show would you want to host: The Soup, Chelsea Lately, Biggest Loser, a Japanese Game Show?
This is a tough choice. Can I sit on Chelsea Handler’s panel of Chelsea lately and make fun of everyone and then actually host the Biggest Loser?? OR the Japanese Game Show?? Hmm… I choose The Soup because I could talk about all my shows and get my face on television. The Soup is my final answer.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Series Premiere
After receiving an email with the middle name as Gray these emails corresponded.
Roxie: Are we now naming our children after colors? If so, I claim Fuchsia.
Elisabeth (yes with an s just to be obnoxious) Fuchsia. Better than Murphy right?
Trixie: I wanted fuschia!!! I will take navy, olive, and burgundy, just in case
R: True, you do need three baby names to my one! I think I will also claim Indigo for that “accidental” baby.
Murphy Indigo. Has a nice ring to it!
T: INDIGO!!! AAH! Good one! NO offense, but I may steal it… after all, I am gonna have it first – what with baby fever and all :)
R: Fine. The one who births first can claim Indigo. I might just go with a normal color like orange.
Trixie, meet my daughter Orange. She’s a color and a fruit!! So Hollywood!
T: I like it!
Neither of us are pregnant, but if we ever do become pregnant, we now have names.
Roxie: Are we now naming our children after colors? If so, I claim Fuchsia.
Elisabeth (yes with an s just to be obnoxious) Fuchsia. Better than Murphy right?
Trixie: I wanted fuschia!!! I will take navy, olive, and burgundy, just in case
R: True, you do need three baby names to my one! I think I will also claim Indigo for that “accidental” baby.
Murphy Indigo. Has a nice ring to it!
T: INDIGO!!! AAH! Good one! NO offense, but I may steal it… after all, I am gonna have it first – what with baby fever and all :)
R: Fine. The one who births first can claim Indigo. I might just go with a normal color like orange.
Trixie, meet my daughter Orange. She’s a color and a fruit!! So Hollywood!
T: I like it!
Neither of us are pregnant, but if we ever do become pregnant, we now have names.
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